I’ve always had trouble with God. You can’t see him, can’t hear him. Is there really a God out there and is he really concerned about me? I’d heard about God from practically Day One, learned the routine prayers, was baptized and made my First Communion. But like the atheist in the foxhole, I never actually said a personal word to God until my first roller coaster ride. As a tiny little thing at age 12 I flew up in the air as the roller coaster made its first down-dip. “God!” I cried. Even then I recognized it as my first real prayer.

In high school, despite my pitiful allowance, I would part with a precious dime to buy a Sunday Visitor at church each week. To this day I remember Dale Francis as being my favorite columnist. The things of God interested me but I would never have said we had a personal relationship. The saints, especially, were a problem. It seemed they were always talking to God and he to them. It seemed they knew him up close and personal.

I, on the other hand, sounded like the psalmist when I prayed: “God, where are you? Why don’t you answer? I cry out to you all day long and you are silent. Why have you abandoned me?” Read the rest of this entry »